Category Archives: actions

Does it matter the love is forced?

So, it’s the time of year where fat little perverts are swaddled in nappies, brandishing bow and arrows fly aimlessly around taking aim at unsuspecting people, and those tinny little tunes blast out of cheery, brightly coloured adverts with a big punch of “if you don’t buy your significant other this particular item they’ll forever distrust your love and feel like you just don’t care enough”.

I’m a big one for expressing my love for people through gift giving, little notes, hugs and kisses. I’m very expressive. Not everyone is like that. I know some couples where a simple shoulder squeeze is their equivalent of “I love you”. There love is no less than mine, it’s just different.

Many people hate valentines day, or dislike it , claiming its a hallmark holiday and forced love is crap. It is pretty crappy if you’re single on valentines day. But then I read a fabulous thing about that just today.

If you’re single, then be your own valentine. Take some time out to pamper yourself. Treat yourself, be it to a takeaway, a new necklace or that PS4 game you’ve been lusting after. Why not?

I’m apathetic about valentines day. For me it’s a great excuse to be gushy and emotional. And I like getting a card from the hubby with the nice words inside. I keep these, they go in my memory box.

And I can’t help but think,

With the world being such a cruel place, with such hatred, aminosity and sadness…then surely even “enforced romance” and subsequent enforced love, well it isn’t all that bad an idea. The world needs more smiles, more I love you’s, more shoulder squeezes. And if people need a nudge to give them, all be it perhaps a bit grudgingly, well it’s not the end of the world.

At the end of the day you don’t have to buy into valentines day with all the hype. You don’t need to buy her Cartier diamonds and send her 10 dozen red roses, and you don’t need to sex him up all night long so you’re walking like John Wayne the next day. You can partake as much, or as little, as you want. But it’s always nice to have someone be kind to you.

I think my biggest thing with valentines day, is that it highlights just how … stagnant we can be in relationships, and when we’re not. We let each day merge into one, all those pressures of life taking up your head space. Leaving you with little time to think of each other, little time to remember to say I love you, or establish physical contact…..Valentines day to me, just reminds me of how far removed we can be from even our most loved ones.

And like I say, with the world in such a sad state of affairs, it’s nice to see even just one day of a little enhanced happiness and love floating around. So this valentines day, instead of bemoaning that it’s an enforced holiday, take it in the spirit it’s meant. As an excuse to let your loved one know they’re loved. Do that how you wish, just remember to do it. Life isn’t infinite. And we don’t get a second chance.